Friendship through an Adoption
Today I would like to write a short story of a friendship made through an adoption from long ago.
Many years ago during my early trips to India I would visit the orphanage where at that time my 2 beautiful girls came from. I would go back to the orphanage as many times as I could during each visit to India to see the Massies and the children. On some days I would visit one or two times a day and I was always a welcome visitor at the Home.
I watched with my own eyes as the Massies took care of the children. It was always 2 small babies to one Massie. The Massies would feed one baby while the other baby slept in a small crib, or maybe when feeding one baby they would rock the baby to sleep in a small infant rocking seat. If some of the children were a little older, I watched the Massies hold the child’s hand and take their first footsteps in the long hallway of the building.
Here is the bottom line, I always remember the love that was given to each child whatever their needs were in the orphanage until the adoption paperwork was completed in the courts and the child could be processed out to their forever home. Many times to the USA but also to other countries as well as domestic adoptions.
One sad part of each visit at the orphanage was visiting the handicapped children in the orphanage. I am sorry to say that these children rarely got adopted and the same children were there for me to visit year after year. It was so sad even to this day to think about. Some of the children were blind others were delayed or could not walk.
Over the years I have followed these handicapped children. Many are now 20 to 25 years old and living at another orphanage. I am very proud to say I still visit every one of these children that are still alive as many have passed away. They are like part of my family. The children still to this day have a wonderful staff who looks after them in every way. Please understand that a Massie most of the time is an older woman and very strong. To move one of these adult children from a bed to a wheelchair takes lots of strength and at times it takes 2 women to do it as there are no machines to do it. It’s all manual labor.
It’s a long story but my boy Raymond came to us as handicapped and he has brought so much love to our family. He can not walk or speak but he is so beautiful in every way. I believe in my heart he was God’s gift sent to me and my family. So now you can understand that I have 3 adopted children: two girls and a boy.
I can only say this about our 3 adoptions long ago … You do not just pay money to adopt a child, that was secondary. First you must prove to the court system in India and the USA that you are worthy to adopt a child and that you have a job and funds to support a child. Trust me, there is a mountain of paperwork along with Social Workers home visits and interviews.
So now you know about me and my visits along with a little about adoptions……I am sure rules have changed over the years but living in the USA and doing an international adoption takes a lot of time because you are dealing with the rules and laws of two countries.
As I wrote earlier, on every trip to India I visit the orphanage where my children came from to say Thank You to everyone and have a nice visit every day for a few hours… The Massis liked that I remembered all of them and the children and came back to see them each year until the orphanage closed its doors.
I would always stay in the nursery with everyone. The Massies would let me hold their babies that are waiting to be adopted or they may make something for me to eat like soup that I carry around with me. I would eat right there with everyone. It was always a fantastic visit and I loved every minute of it seeing everyone.
With adoptions there is usually a 9 month to a one year wait for the adoption process to move forward after being assigned a child. The courts are slow in the USA and India and it takes time to look after every detail of the prospective adoptive parents to make sure everything is in order. During this time it is a very long stressful wait for the adoptive parents.
Remember 25 years ago there were no cell phones or computers. All you got was a small photo of your new baby to adopt, along with a little paperwork saying a little about him or her. During this waiting time, if someone were to visit the orphanage where their baby was, a family here may ask , if you can take a few photos of their baby for us or maybe bring something to the child. When you become a part of adoption you understand that you are now part of adoption families, and that means to help anyone any way that you can especially during this long waiting period.
Finally, on one day everything is complete and the courts in India and the USA give the ok to the orphanage that everything has been completed and that the baby can now travel home wherever that may be to their forever family.
So here I am in India visiting the orphanage as usual enjoying myself.
The manager came up to me and said Ray, we have a baby now ready for transport to the United States. The paperwork has all been completed and she is ready to go . Would you be willing to be the first part of the escort team to get her home to her parents in the United States when you go home in a few days?
I have to admit I do not know much about looking after babies and it was a little frightening to think about, but I said it will be an honor to escort the child home.
With that they got the baby for me to see, a beautiful little girl and they put her in my arms. I’m telling you it was a moment long long long ago but I still feel the happiness of that moment even today, as I write this mail to all of you.
Annie was beautiful !
During my next few days visiting the orphanage to end my trip that year the Massies would give me formula to mix bottles to sit and feed Annie to make sure that I knew what to do on the long airplane ride home to the USA,
as I was traveling alone and Annie was my responsibility .
Finally the time came for Annie and myself to travel to the airport and fly home together to the United States.
I was given a big envelope of paperwork for Annie from the orphanage with the legal documents to travel along with Annie‘s plane ticket. I was also given a bag full of baby formula along with bottles, diapers and wipes. We had a 2 AM flight so we left for the airport at 9:30 PM just in case there were any problems at the airport.
With the officials at the airport looking over Annie’s paperwork everything worked out fine.
At 2 AM the huge plane took off down the bumpy runway. Once the airplane lifted off the ground and it was smooth as the plane accelerated into the night sky. I knew Annie was on the way home and there was no turning back now. I was so happy for her that I had tears running down my face.
After two very long flights and some help from two other women passengers feeding and changing Annie on the airplane , Annie and I arrived in Boston.
After going through security with Annie and showing her immigration paperwork along with mine to the officials, we were allowed to enter the United States of America…
When I walked out to the arrival area, there was my wife Patty waiting for me and here I was with no real luggage (as I gave everything away in India) and a baby in my arms.
Patty just looked at me and started to cry….
It took a few minutes for me to explain everything to Patty. She said Ray, she is beautiful…
After a short wait at the airport I met the next escort that would bring Annie to her family.
As I gave the baby basket to the escort, Patty said to me, I want to keep her and started to cry again.
I have to admit I did not want to say goodbye either to Annie.. But we said goodbye and I went home with Patty and Annie continued her Journey to her forever home with her new escort.
Over the many years I have often thought about that trip and me bringing that little girl halfway around the world to her family. It has been so special to me all these years .
Once Annie got home a few days later her mother wrote to me to tell me everything was good and she thanked me for all my help.
Annie went to a family that already had 3 brothers along with a Mom and Dad.
Over the years I have shared many mails with Annie‘s Mother telling me about Annie growing up, as well about the boys. The Mother also told me about family trips together with the kids and the 3 boys all becoming Eagle Boy Scouts.
I often think of Annie‘s family like my family, Happy together doing things together with many good memories
Time has moved forward many years from when I first met Annie in India and I would like to show you a few photos of Annie and her family from long ago to today…
Annie has become a teacher … And I want the entire world to know that I am very proud of her just like her family is.
Below you will find a few photos to tell the rest of the story…
God Bless you Annie and all the other adopted children in the world.
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To end, this is a video of Annie today, it was sent to me from her mother…
It is a fun video of Annie – being honored as a 1st grade teacher. Just think – you had something to do with her beginnings!